Being in the Present…Even if you are a little uncomfortable!

I can’t believe I am saying this, but I miss my kids already. The school vacation seemed long at times and I was counting the days until they were back in school so I could get back into my routine here at home. Don’t get me wrong, I love my boys to pieces, but they can get to be a couple of pains at times. As I sit here, up way earlier than any day of the vacation, it seems a bit lonely without them. Funny how we look forward to the “next” thing….like when they were little we couldn’t wait for milestones of sitting, crawling, standing, walking. Then there was getting rid of the diapers, and before we knew it, the first day of school. And now they are 11 and 15 and I miss them climbing onto my lap and just snuggling. I think it is too easy to take things and especially people for granted. I didn’t write any resolutions for the new year, but I certainly want to make some big changes for the year. One on the top of my list is to be more “present” when I am with my sons and my husband. I am not talking physically spending time together(although more of that would be good, too), I mean being present in my mind and turning off my wandering thoughts. Focusing in on the person I am with and the quality of our time since the quantity may not always be ideal is a big priority for me. The other day I even went outside in the freezing cold that is winter where I live to “play” with the kids for a bit. I said a bit…a very little bit because if you know me you know I am a California girl at heart and this winter weather where I live is horrible and makes me miserable for many months of the year. So, usually I sit inside and wave from the window while the kids play, but I have to tell you it meant so much to my younger son, especially, that I went outside to be with them for some play time. As a Mom, it is not always about me and my comfort(especially when they were both forcing themselves out of my vaginal opening at over 9 pounds each), but instead about the time I can give them. What I learned from this most recent time was that it doesn’t take much. I’ll admit I wasn’t overly miserable and it put a smile on my son’s face. So, there it is! My first resolution of the New Year: be more in the present!

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