Homecoming is a little bittersweet

I remember the excitement of homecoming week very well. I was a cheerleader in high school, so I played an active role in bringing out  school spirit in my fellow classmates. The Friday pep rally that week was filled with so much energy and excitement and the football game under the lights that evening brought out some of the most loyal fans in high school football. We were the Bulldogs, after all.

This week has been homecoming week at the high school here. Nick is a freshman this year, so he’s having his first experience with the festivities. He chose not to ride on his class float. I understand the reason, it’s just not his thing. He’s currently at the football game, though, then staying at school for the homecoming dance afterward. I think it’s just mostly to hang out with his friends because apparently three hours every day after school just isn’t enough time to spend with them. I’m actually really pleased he has such a tight group of friends. It’s quite incredible actually.

This is Cody’s third year at the high school and it was his second year riding on the float in the homecoming parade. He simply loves being with his peers smiling and cheering while making sure to give me a wave while passing by me on the sidewalk. While I beam with pride to see him be a part of such a special high school tradition, it was a little stinging for me today. As I stood waiting for the floats, I couldn’t look directly at the students on the first float, the senior float. The class of 2013. Here’s the thing. Many of those kids entered kindergarten with Cody. I watched them grow and learn together in elementary school. They looked out for Cody and some of them came to his birthday parties. He won’t be graduating with them. He spent four years in middle school instead of three and he will spend five years in high school instead of four. This is what’s truly best for him with his special education needs and while my head knows it’s best, my heart aches a little for what could have been if autism hadn’t joined our family. Maybe he would have played a sport or joined a school club. Maybe he would have chosen to do no extra curricular activities and focus solely on his classwork, but he would be a senior right now, riding on that float with the kids he’s known since kindergarten. The class of 2013.