Learning how to parent

This morning while making and packing lunches for Cody and Nick I remembered a conversation I recently had with my friend, Kelly on Twitter. We’re friends because we bonded over pairing wine and popcorn. Also though, she created a great product for lunchboxes and you should totally be using them. They’re durable, BPA-free, and have three sections, making it easier and quicker when packing lunches before the hour of 7 a.m. in the morning. I know! That’s way early and I usually don’t even drink any coffee before I pack those lunches.

So while I was thinking about our conversation and the fact that Kelly tweeted she admired me for packing my kids’ lunches because she had taught her children to pack their own, I wasn’t sure I felt worthy of admiration for simply doing my job as Mom to Cody and Nick. Here’s the thing, when I was their age, I often took care of myself in the morning. I poured my own cereal or popped bread in the toaster because that were the only choices I had for breakfast and I made my own lunch or hoped my Mom had a couple of dollars because sometimes there just wasn’t anything at home to bring for lunch.(Or possibly nothing I wanted to bring.) I’d have to wake her up to ask for that money and if she didn’t have any then I was just out of luck for the day. I’m all for kids being independent and taking an active role in their meals and meal preparation, but I simply can’t imagine staying in bed while they fend for themselves in the morning. I’m pretty sure my kids just figure this is the way all Moms are and they might even take me for granted a little. For so many reasons I’m okay with that. I think in many cases we don’t have the truest appreciation for people and things unless we’ve lived without them. Unfortunately, I’m not the Mom I am because of a wonderful example that was set for me, but rather, one that was not. I often find myself thinking that I learned how not to do things as a Mom. That’s not easy to admit or realize and this is certainly not a post to criticize or insult my mother. I love my Mom and I always will and I truly believe she did the best with what she knew at the time. However, it brought me a very clear vision of what I wanted to be for my kids and I’m certainly far from perfect and I would never claim to be, but I hope some day when they are grown up and have their own children they will remember those early school day mornings when I made pancakes from scratch while packing them healthy lunches and it will mean something to them. Not having it for myself certainly meant something to me.